Go by Actions

One of the most complex issues you will ever deal with both in business and personal relationships is when someone tells you one thing, but does another.  When you’re facing conflicting messages from someone, go by the actions. 

Your boss says he values you, but never demonstrates it with your pay or benefits.  Your wife says she will quit drugging, but she goes on another binge.  Your husband promises to stop cheating on you, but you discover he has another profile on an Internet dating site.

If I learned anything after four year of therapy it is this:  What people tell you means a lot less than what they actually show you.

Truth is seldom heard, but it’s usually seen. 

-RG

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65 Replies to “Go by Actions”

  1. In my country I have heard many people say “Do what I say but do not act like me” because it is easier say something than do it

    Reply

  2. In my country I have heard many people say “Do what I say but do not act like me” because it is easier say something than do it

    Reply

  3. Wonder why it’s so quiet here….. hmmmm…….. Perhaps it is because we (and by “we”, I mean “I”) are thinking about the points you make and realizing we don’t always do what we say we will. Actions don’t just speak louder than words. Actions eliminate the need for words.

    Reply

    1. @Linda Ryan Great comment Linda! I like “Actions eliminate the need for words”…especially apologies.

      -Sean

      Reply

    2. And that’s exactly where I want to go on the next post!

      -RG

      Reply

  4. Wonder why it’s so quiet here….. hmmmm…….. Perhaps it is because we (and by “we”, I mean “I”) are thinking about the points you make and realizing we don’t always do what we say we will. Actions don’t just speak louder than words. Actions eliminate the need for words.

    Reply

  5. Great stuff RG! And I think this applies equally to ourselves and how often our personal/internal talk conflicts with our walk! We need to demand integrity from ourselves as well as others. The only catch is, with one of these situations, we can just walk away/remove them from our lives, but the other, unfortunately, is so hard to give the slip to! Lol.

    -Sean

    Reply

  6. Great stuff RG! And I think this applies equally to ourselves and how often our personal/internal talk conflicts with our walk! We need to demand integrity from ourselves as well as others. The only catch is, with one of these situations, we can just walk away/remove them from our lives, but the other, unfortunately, is so hard to give the slip to! Lol.

    -Sean

    Reply

  7. @Linda Ryan Great comment Linda! I like “Actions eliminate the need for words”…especially apologies.

    -Sean

    Reply

  8. And that’s exactly where I want to go on the next post!

    -RG

    Reply

  9. @JiminLai Thanks dude

    Reply

  10. @JiminLai Thanks dude

    Reply

  11. Interesting!

    ….right now, for the first time in my life I truly realize with your post today, Randy – since I was in parallel brought up on a 2nd stage in life – that ACTION was being practised a lot – for me. Whatever they (Dr.´s + nurses) said, they did it.

    OK, they were being paid to do so, but this 2nd stage and all the positive outcome of all the action, conditioned me to really “do” things. Guess, I am much related to it.

    Never noticed it.But it so clear right now.

    Lucky me –

    – thanks for being part of this –

    Reply

  12. Interesting!

    ….right now, for the first time in my life I truly realize with your post today, Randy – since I was in parallel brought up on a 2nd stage in life – that ACTION was being practised a lot – for me. Whatever they (Dr.´s + nurses) said, they did it.

    OK, they were being paid to do so, but this 2nd stage and all the positive outcome of all the action, conditioned me to really “do” things. Guess, I am much related to it.

    Never noticed it.But it so clear right now.

    Lucky me –

    – thanks for being part of this –

    Reply

  13. AMEN… I learned, very recently, that its best to walk away from people like that because staying will get me nowhere! And I don’t have to stay upset about it anymore!! It feels good to move on, and move up the ladder. I have to give you credit Randy, you really help me out!

    Reply

  14. AMEN… I learned, very recently, that its best to walk away from people like that because staying will get me nowhere! And I don’t have to stay upset about it anymore!! It feels good to move on, and move up the ladder. I have to give you credit Randy, you really help me out!

    Reply

  15. So true.Thank you.

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  16. So true.Thank you.

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    Reply

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  19. Randy, we appreciate your actions. Thanks for the blog.

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  20. Randy, we appreciate your actions. Thanks for the blog.

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  21. @darryl_brown7 Thanks 4 the love!

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  22. @darryl_brown7 Thanks 4 the love!

    Reply

  23. YOU ROCK Randy Gage. Is this why I had to share the latest in my life with you? Thanks!! Bless you for your love… and using it to teach others!

    Reply

  24. YOU ROCK Randy Gage. Is this why I had to share the latest in my life with you? Thanks!! Bless you for your love… and using it to teach others!

    Reply

  25. @malejagonzam Thanks!

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  26. @malejagonzam Thanks!

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  27. So true. Actions speak louder than words!

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  28. So true. Actions speak louder than words!

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  29. Terry Feuerbacher February 16, 2012 at 6:43 pm

    So true!

    Reply

  30. Terry Feuerbacher February 16, 2012 at 11:43 pm

    So true!

    Reply

  31. @warrenwwwong Thanks!

    Reply

  32. @warrenwwwong Thanks!

    Reply

  33. @kevinfrancis Thanks!

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  34. @kevinfrancis Thanks!

    Reply

  35. Wonderful Randy, It is a good booster for me to get off my ass and start making it happen

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  36. Wonderful Randy, It is a good booster for me to get off my ass and start making it happen

    Reply

  37. ..and the truth sets us free!

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  38. ..and the truth sets us free!

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  39. @JCOblessed Thanks for all your kindness as a super-hero RTer!!!

    Reply

  40. @JCOblessed Thanks for all your kindness as a super-hero RTer!!!

    Reply

  41. When someone genuinely cares about you, you know it.Friends and family and even others claim to care about you, but they really don’t when they’re not interested in helping you succeed and would rather be negative, pessimistic and give you every reason under the sun for why it’s totally impossible to achieve something.Must be nice to choose to remain ignorant and always give the people who are putting in the effort crap because they aren’t instantly successful.

    Reply

  42. When someone genuinely cares about you, you know it.Friends and family and even others claim to care about you, but they really don’t when they’re not interested in helping you succeed and would rather be negative, pessimistic and give you every reason under the sun for why it’s totally impossible to achieve something.Must be nice to choose to remain ignorant and always give the people who are putting in the effort crap because they aren’t instantly successful.

    Reply

  43. This means, we shouldn’t promise something unless we’re willing to deliver, and if we can’t we’d better figure out how to.

    Reply

    1. @ThomasMrak …or we deliver before we even talk about it!!! 🙂

      Reply

  44. This means, we shouldn’t promise something unless we’re willing to deliver, and if we can’t we’d better figure out how to.

    Reply

  45. @ThomasMrak …or we deliver before we even talk about it!!! 🙂

    Reply

  46. Funny to read this when I was literally JUST thinking about the old adage “actions speak louder than words.” However, I remember a great quote that made me think also, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”- Maya Angelou.

    So I guess the question is, do you go just by actions, or perhaps something deeper?

    just a thought.

    Reply

  47. Funny to read this when I was literally JUST thinking about the old adage “actions speak louder than words.” However, I remember a great quote that made me think also, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”- Maya Angelou.

    So I guess the question is, do you go just by actions, or perhaps something deeper?

    just a thought.

    Reply

  48. Complete agreement! BEHAVIOR NEVER LIES !!!

    Reply

  49. Complete agreement! BEHAVIOR NEVER LIES !!!

    Reply

  50. So truh

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  51. So truh

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  52. Linda Andrews Kubie March 1, 2012 at 10:47 pm

    Absolutely true!!!

    Reply

  53. Mary-Ellen Johnson March 1, 2012 at 10:47 pm

    Truth is easily seen by the truthful, as well as manipulation is easily seen by manipulators. You can not change anyone, and if you are trying, then you need to change yourself. Action is great as long as it is of the will of god. If it is not, then there is only one other place it can be coming from, the devil.

    Reply

  54. Linda Andrews Kubie March 2, 2012 at 3:47 am

    Absolutely true!!!

    Reply

  55. Mary-Ellen Johnson March 2, 2012 at 3:47 am

    Truth is easily seen by the truthful, as well as manipulation is easily seen by manipulators. You can not change anyone, and if you are trying, then you need to change yourself. Action is great as long as it is of the will of god. If it is not, then there is only one other place it can be coming from, the devil.

    Reply

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