Stop Negotiating With Your Old Self

I’ve been biting my lip so hard the blood is gushing past my navel. Okay, I could be exaggerating that a titch…

But after watching the Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and New Year’s promos from the personal growth industry, it feels justified.

You probably noticed—you didn’t get any of that from me. I respect you and personal growth too much to turn it into a holiday appliance sale. What’s happening out there isn’t inspiring—it’s embarrassing.

Personal development is the only industry where people pay $2,997 to be told to drink more water, be present, and jump in an ice plunge. FFS.

Let’s step back from the empty-calorie motivation.

Allow me to blow up some of the dangerous misconceptions about personal growth, making changes that stick, and actually manifesting your goals and dreams into reality.

Let’s begin with dangerous.  As in, I believe that…

The most dangerous moment in personal development is when you’re inspired, but unchanged.

Why?  Because too often, we romanticize motivation but don’t have an actual plan for execution.  If you’re still diagnosing instead of deciding, you’re not stuck—you’re avoiding admission.

I love vision boards and have employed them for at least 20 years with more than a 98 percent degree of success. But if all you do is a vision board—and you change nothing in your information diet, daily habits, or core foundational beliefs—all you’re doing is a second-grade arts & crafts project.

Nothing kills new resolutions energy faster than old habits. 

Same thing with affirmations, journaling, and writing movie scripts of your perfect day. Even doing a burning bowl ceremony.  If you’ve done all those things for that last 5, 8, or 18 New Year’s, and nothing has changed—what on Earth makes you think they’re going to magically work this year?

What you put on your calendar can turn everything on your vision board into a lie. Your affirmations fail when your nervous system doesn’t believe the bullshit quotes you put on your Pinterest board!  😬

Positive thinking doesn’t create results—decisive thinking followed by mindful action does. Because optimism without execution is just Kabuki theater.

Reading more books or listening to more podcasts won’t change your life if you keep rereading or relistening the same beliefs. 

Chances are good that your biggest problem isn’t lack of discipline—it’s loyalty to an identity that no longer serves you. Far too many times, you’ve said you wanted a fresh start…but then kept negotiating with the old you. The old identity that you’re still hanging on to and need to kill off.

If you keep finding yourself “starting over” every January, it’s because you never finished killing the old version of you—the one who negotiates with habits, delays hard conversations, and calls comfort “being realistic.” (The brain resists change; the identity defends it violently.)

Motivation is unreliable; identity is inevitable.

You change your results once you change your identity: How you see yourself.  Because you will always act in alignment with who you believe you are.  (Self-sabotage is usually created by your ego desperately trying to protect the old, “comfortable” version of yourself.)

The hardest thing to forgive is yourself—for what you knew better than to accept.  Trust me, I know this with every fiber of my being…

I was in a jail cell for armed robbery as a teen, had my business seized by the tax authorities, and been shot and left for dead. I know what it is to be broken, frightened, and alone.  And I know what it is to come out on the other side triumphant…

I want to show you how.

Because if I learned anything along my tumultuous journey, I learned this: Sometimes the grief isn’t for who you lost—but for who you never became.

I also know this: Your younger self didn’t dream of being tired, overwhelmed, and unfulfilled.  Every year you delay becoming who you are costs you something you can’t get back.  The saddest moment in growth isn’t failure; it’s realizing how long you lived beneath your potential.

The real tragedy isn’t that life is hard—it’s that so many people never claim the life they were meant to live. Please. Don’t allow that to happen for you. If you know you are meant to do, have, and become more, join me in the new cohort of the Breakthrough U program.

• If you’re an entrepreneur looking to launch, develop, or scale a business...
• If you’re a high-level achiever who wants to operate at the pinnacle of peak performance...
• If you lead a movement that desires to alter the trajectory of the universe…

Breakthrough U is the program that can get you there.  We will rewrite your operating system, blow up the limiting beliefs that restrict your actions, and create your new identity as the healthy, happy, prosperous person you are meant to be. This program isn’t simply content—it’s cadence. Weekly execution. Identity reinforcement. And accountability that doesn’t let you hide.

There’s a price level everyone can afford. (The real reason people avoid coaching is not money—it’s because they don’t want to face accountability without escape hatches.)

Set aside the time and read the complete details here. Choose your level then lock in your spot this weekend, as the first update goes out Monday. That’s when execution begins.

There’s a version of you who was brave, bold, and determined once.  And if you’re still reading by this point, that person is back!

Happy New You!

- RG

P.S. If you’re waiting to “feel ready,” that’s your old identity talking. Tell it to shut up. Your transformation doesn’t start when motivation strikes; it starts when you stop negotiating. The first “Monday Mojo” is about to come out.  If you know this message is about you, don’t overthink it. Choose your level. Lock in. And let execution—not intention—define your 2026.