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The Question to Ask Yourself

Posted By: Randy GageJuly 28, 2019

Most people spend their life searching for answers.  But I find that searching for better questions produces much better results.  The only caveat is that if you ask the wrong question, the answer is irrelevant.  Or even misleading.

Perhaps the best results come when you ask questions of self-discovery.  Not tepid cliché questions, but radical self-inquiry.  This type of question moves the focus from external factors to internal ones.  External focus is designed for you to escape responsibility, play victim, and blame others.  I know this well, because I did it for almost 30 years.  Mistake after mistake, failure after failure, setback after setback, I blamed my ex, my partners, the economy, fate, destiny and bad luck.  The right question for me turned out to be:

“Is there one person who was always at the scene of the crime?”

When I went into that radical self-inquiry and honestly asked – and answered – that question, everything changed.  Because then the focus turned internal. Into what I needed to change, to become the person I wanted to be, and live the life I desired to live.

The right question blows us your “story,” the victim narrative you’ve created to avoid facing reality and personal accountability.  So that leads us to the most fascinating question yet.  Which is…

What is the question you need to be asking yourself?

-RG

3 comments on “The Question to Ask Yourself”

  1. I told your boo hoo story to a good friend of mine from Sierra Leone and he loved it too..in essence.. what's the common denominator of all these fuck-ups? YOU!!! Oh my mother was so deadly for blaming everyone else for her problems but herself...just a cold bitch who wanted to be left alone, so I did.. then she got put in a home when she got dementia by the gov and oh, of course it was my fault.. real piece of work.. I remember my ex said, if I had a mother like that I would have told her to fuck off years ago... hard thing to come to grips with when you got a mother like that.. but I have.. no choice.. one of my fav novels is East of Eden and there's a hard bitten woman who is the mother of the two sons and hard as a nail and that's just the way my mom was and accept it...

  2. You are right Randy. T have to face the man or woman in the mirror and start asking questions that set us free.

  3. In my case :
    How long I'll deny my greatness? When I'm gonna quit playing small and involve 100% in my business?

    Thanks Randy, sometimes we need to ask vital questions to find our path!

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  • 3 comments on “The Question to Ask Yourself”

    1. I told your boo hoo story to a good friend of mine from Sierra Leone and he loved it too..in essence.. what's the common denominator of all these fuck-ups? YOU!!! Oh my mother was so deadly for blaming everyone else for her problems but herself...just a cold bitch who wanted to be left alone, so I did.. then she got put in a home when she got dementia by the gov and oh, of course it was my fault.. real piece of work.. I remember my ex said, if I had a mother like that I would have told her to fuck off years ago... hard thing to come to grips with when you got a mother like that.. but I have.. no choice.. one of my fav novels is East of Eden and there's a hard bitten woman who is the mother of the two sons and hard as a nail and that's just the way my mom was and accept it...

    2. You are right Randy. T have to face the man or woman in the mirror and start asking questions that set us free.

    3. In my case :
      How long I'll deny my greatness? When I'm gonna quit playing small and involve 100% in my business?

      Thanks Randy, sometimes we need to ask vital questions to find our path!

    Leave a Reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

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